now i understand..

We never really understand til we undergo it. Now i understand.. We live to suffer and with this suffering, only we will be force to learn how to appreciate the little happiness we get in life. I thought i knew how bad this shit gonna take its toll on me, but it seems like.. the pain is so.. painful..zzzz.. maybe the only word to describe this misery is life. I can't seem to find another word synonym to this shit. Neither damn nor fuck works anymore.. I think this time.. I can really imagine - slamming my head real hard on the wall and the pain is nothing compared to the pain i'm taking in.. oh my wonderful life~ how nice~